Lost everyone except the wife.. Just me and my baby, against the world.
I lost my brother suddenly in 2017. Worst few subsequent months of my life, though I wasn't emotional the day I got the news as I was in shock. I remember calling my dad to relay the news that my brother, his only other son, was gone. I relayed the news calmly and my dad asked me to repeat what I had said and confirm by gone I meant gone gone and then he lost it on the phone and had his girlfriend drive him up from St. Augustine later that day because he was now in no state to drive. Unfortunately, my brother's passing occurred just 6 weeks after my wife and I brought our first child into the world which should have been a happier time. I would soon learn shortly after the day of shock how much and how easily I could cry my eyes out uncontrollably at hearing certain songs or having discussions about him and his life. I couldn't get past a couple of sentences without breaking down when relaying the news to friends and that same sequence happened with each friend I relayed the news to. It didn't get easier the 2nd or 3rd or 4th time etc. I remember going to my orthodontist appointment a few weeks after his passing. My brother also had an appointment scheduled at the same orthodontist set for a couple of weeks after mine. As I left my appointment, I relayed to the receptionist that my brother wouldn't be making his appointment and why and as the words left my mouth I abruptly rushed out of there to go bawl my eyes out in the car instead of in front of her. I'm generally the least outwardly emotional guy you'll run across, but losing someone close easily knocks down those protective walls.
A few days after burying my brother, I got a call from a friend the morning of the Metallica show at the Citrus Bowl in Orlando with an extra ticket asking if I wanted it. I asked him for a few minutes to consider the offer given my mental state at the time. The wife said to go, so I called him back and I went. It wound up being a great [BLEEP] show! I'd never seen Metallica before, but grew up getting into metal at a young age because of them. Had my brother still been alive, we'd have been trying to find a 3rd ticket because he would have been there too. If there's an afterlife, he was definitely there with me regardless. I remember tearing up a few times during the show with this thought in my mind. Very cathartic experience that particular show was for me.
Also, I lost my best friend suddenly at age 7. I remember my mom waking me one evening to tell me the news and I distinctly remember that cry, long ago as it was. It was like the universe had ripped a part of my soul from me, though I probably couldn't have put it into those words at that age. Same exact feeling with my brother.
[BLEEP] me, I'm tearing up just typing all this out.
(06-09-2024, 11:33 AM)Jaguarmeister Wrote: [ -> ]I lost my brother suddenly in 2017. Worst few subsequent months of my life, though I wasn't emotional the day I got the news as I was in shock. I remember calling my dad to relay the news that my brother, his only other son, was gone. I relayed the news calmly and my dad asked me to repeat what I had said and confirm by gone I meant gone gone and then he lost it on the phone and had his girlfriend drive him up from St. Augustine later that day because he was now in no state to drive. Unfortunately, my brother's passing occurred just 6 weeks after my wife and I brought our first child into the world which should have been a happier time. I would soon learn shortly after the day of shock how much and how easily I could cry my eyes out uncontrollably at hearing certain songs or having discussions about him and his life. I couldn't get past a couple of sentences without breaking down when relaying the news to friends and that same sequence happened with each friend I relayed the news to. It didn't get easier the 2nd or 3rd or 4th time etc. I remember going to my orthodontist appointment a few weeks after his passing. My brother also had an appointment scheduled at the same orthodontist set for a couple of weeks after mine. As I left my appointment, I relayed to the receptionist that my brother wouldn't be making his appointment and why and as the words left my mouth I abruptly rushed out of there to go bawl my eyes out in the car instead of in front of her. I'm generally the least outwardly emotional guy you'll run across, but losing someone close easily knocks down those protective walls.
A few days after burying my brother, I got a call from a friend the morning of the Metallica show at the Citrus Bowl in Orlando with an extra ticket asking if I wanted it. I asked him for a few minutes to consider the offer given my mental state at the time. The wife said to go, so I called him back and I went. It wound up being a great [BLEEP] show! I'd never seen Metallica before, but grew up getting into metal at a young age because of them. Had my brother still been alive, we'd have been trying to find a 3rd ticket because he would have been there too. If there's an afterlife, he was definitely there with me regardless. I remember tearing up a few times during the show with this thought in my mind. Very cathartic experience that particular show was for me.
Also, I lost my best friend suddenly at age 7. I remember my mom waking me one evening to tell me the news and I distinctly remember that cry, long ago as it was. It was like the universe had ripped a part of my soul from me, though I probably couldn't have put it into those words at that age. Same exact feeling with my brother.
[BLEEP] me, I'm tearing up just typing all this out.
I'm so sorry that happened, man.. There's literally no words of comfort that anyone can tell you to help you in that situation. That's a life changer.. The only advice that I can give, is that it gets easier.
I lost my brother a handful of years ago as well, he was 28 and stationed in Grand Forks AFB.. He developed a blood clot from a surgery and it just took him. My only comfort was that I was told that he went quickly. Got his folded flag in our glass hutch, next to the ashes of my mom & dad that passed a few years later.
It gets easier.. Just know you're not alone and I'm always willing to lend an ear.
(06-09-2024, 11:59 AM)WingerDinger Wrote: [ -> ] (06-09-2024, 11:33 AM)Jaguarmeister Wrote: [ -> ]I lost my brother suddenly in 2017. Worst few subsequent months of my life, though I wasn't emotional the day I got the news as I was in shock. I remember calling my dad to relay the news that my brother, his only other son, was gone. I relayed the news calmly and my dad asked me to repeat what I had said and confirm by gone I meant gone gone and then he lost it on the phone and had his girlfriend drive him up from St. Augustine later that day because he was now in no state to drive. Unfortunately, my brother's passing occurred just 6 weeks after my wife and I brought our first child into the world which should have been a happier time. I would soon learn shortly after the day of shock how much and how easily I could cry my eyes out uncontrollably at hearing certain songs or having discussions about him and his life. I couldn't get past a couple of sentences without breaking down when relaying the news to friends and that same sequence happened with each friend I relayed the news to. It didn't get easier the 2nd or 3rd or 4th time etc. I remember going to my orthodontist appointment a few weeks after his passing. My brother also had an appointment scheduled at the same orthodontist set for a couple of weeks after mine. As I left my appointment, I relayed to the receptionist that my brother wouldn't be making his appointment and why and as the words left my mouth I abruptly rushed out of there to go bawl my eyes out in the car instead of in front of her. I'm generally the least outwardly emotional guy you'll run across, but losing someone close easily knocks down those protective walls.
A few days after burying my brother, I got a call from a friend the morning of the Metallica show at the Citrus Bowl in Orlando with an extra ticket asking if I wanted it. I asked him for a few minutes to consider the offer given my mental state at the time. The wife said to go, so I called him back and I went. It wound up being a great [BLEEP] show! I'd never seen Metallica before, but grew up getting into metal at a young age because of them. Had my brother still been alive, we'd have been trying to find a 3rd ticket because he would have been there too. If there's an afterlife, he was definitely there with me regardless. I remember tearing up a few times during the show with this thought in my mind. Very cathartic experience that particular show was for me.
Also, I lost my best friend suddenly at age 7. I remember my mom waking me one evening to tell me the news and I distinctly remember that cry, long ago as it was. It was like the universe had ripped a part of my soul from me, though I probably couldn't have put it into those words at that age. Same exact feeling with my brother.
[BLEEP] me, I'm tearing up just typing all this out.
I'm so sorry that happened, man.. There's literally no words of comfort that anyone can tell you to help you in that situation. That's a life changer.. The only advice that I can give, is that it gets easier.
I lost my brother a handful of years ago as well, he was 28 and stationed in Grand Forks AFB.. He developed a blood clot from a surgery and it just took him. My only comfort was that I was told that he went quickly. Got his folded flag in our glass hutch, next to the ashes of my mom & dad that passed a few years later.
It gets easier.. Just know you're not alone and I'm always willing to lend an ear.
Thanks. I'm good now. Tearing up might not have been the best expression. Just my eyes getting a little moist is all. Time does heal most wounds, but sudden losses like these do leave scars. Sincere condolences for your loss.
My mom's parents were gone before I was born, but I watched the only grand parents I knew (my dad's parents) fade away with dementia at the end. Quite a different experience. I didn't cry at all when they died, because mentally they were each already gone years before.
(06-09-2024, 12:41 PM)Jaguarmeister Wrote: [ -> ] (06-09-2024, 11:59 AM)WingerDinger Wrote: [ -> ]I'm so sorry that happened, man.. There's literally no words of comfort that anyone can tell you to help you in that situation. That's a life changer.. The only advice that I can give, is that it gets easier.
I lost my brother a handful of years ago as well, he was 28 and stationed in Grand Forks AFB.. He developed a blood clot from a surgery and it just took him. My only comfort was that I was told that he went quickly. Got his folded flag in our glass hutch, next to the ashes of my mom & dad that passed a few years later.
It gets easier.. Just know you're not alone and I'm always willing to lend an ear.
Thanks. I'm good now. Tearing up might not have been the best expression. Just my eyes getting a little moist is all. Time does heal most wounds, but sudden losses like these do leave scars.
My mom's parents were gone before I was born, but I watched the only grand parents I knew (my dad's parents) fade away with dementia at the end. Quite a different experience. I didn't cry at all when they died, because mentally they were each already gone years before.
Death has a strange way of desensitizing you.. But it doesn't mean we're still not sad about it. As long as we have an anchor in our lives to help keep us all grounded before we decide to float off into that land of crazy.. Been there, almost claimed me.
Even had someone from this message board talk me out of a few trees and off a cliff lolol..
(And I'll never forget it.. You know who you are!!)
(06-09-2024, 11:33 AM)Jaguarmeister Wrote: [ -> ]I lost my brother suddenly in 2017. Worst few subsequent months of my life, though I wasn't emotional the day I got the news as I was in shock. I remember calling my dad to relay the news that my brother, his only other son, was gone. I relayed the news calmly and my dad asked me to repeat what I had said and confirm by gone I meant gone gone and then he lost it on the phone and had his girlfriend drive him up from St. Augustine later that day because he was now in no state to drive. Unfortunately, my brother's passing occurred just 6 weeks after my wife and I brought our first child into the world which should have been a happier time. I would soon learn shortly after the day of shock how much and how easily I could cry my eyes out uncontrollably at hearing certain songs or having discussions about him and his life. I couldn't get past a couple of sentences without breaking down when relaying the news to friends and that same sequence happened with each friend I relayed the news to. It didn't get easier the 2nd or 3rd or 4th time etc. I remember going to my orthodontist appointment a few weeks after his passing. My brother also had an appointment scheduled at the same orthodontist set for a couple of weeks after mine. As I left my appointment, I relayed to the receptionist that my brother wouldn't be making his appointment and why and as the words left my mouth I abruptly rushed out of there to go bawl my eyes out in the car instead of in front of her. I'm generally the least outwardly emotional guy you'll run across, but losing someone close easily knocks down those protective walls.
A few days after burying my brother, I got a call from a friend the morning of the Metallica show at the Citrus Bowl in Orlando with an extra ticket asking if I wanted it. I asked him for a few minutes to consider the offer given my mental state at the time. The wife said to go, so I called him back and I went. It wound up being a great [BLEEP] show! I'd never seen Metallica before, but grew up getting into metal at a young age because of them. Had my brother still been alive, we'd have been trying to find a 3rd ticket because he would have been there too. If there's an afterlife, he was definitely there with me regardless. I remember tearing up a few times during the show with this thought in my mind. Very cathartic experience that particular show was for me.
Also, I lost my best friend suddenly at age 7. I remember my mom waking me one evening to tell me the news and I distinctly remember that cry, long ago as it was. It was like the universe had ripped a part of my soul from me, though I probably couldn't have put it into those words at that age. Same exact feeling with my brother.
[BLEEP] me, I'm tearing up just typing all this out.
Sorry to hear all that. I am the oldest of three boys. Just had a few drinks this past Saturday night with them over at Miller's Ale House. Couldn't imagine a world without them and I hope they both outlive me so I don't have to suffer the pain of burying one of them or both of them first.
I hear you on the crying as well. There's just different degrees and levels to it for everyone. My Mom recently thought she was diagnosed with Colon Cancer just two weeks ago. Thankfully everything came back in a positive way and it was caught early enough for her to clean her diet up.
But, man, it was rough hearing her cry like that. She hadn't cried like that since her Dad died. It just sticks with you. Metallica is awesome as well. Seen them twice. First time was probably around 2017 as well. We were in Orlando Florida at the World Camping Stadium. It was hotter than 40 hells but we enjoyed it.
Got introduced to Volbeat that day before AX7 came on after them as openers. Good stuff.
(06-10-2024, 12:07 PM)Caldrac Wrote: [ -> ] (06-09-2024, 11:33 AM)Jaguarmeister Wrote: [ -> ]I lost my brother suddenly in 2017. Worst few subsequent months of my life, though I wasn't emotional the day I got the news as I was in shock. I remember calling my dad to relay the news that my brother, his only other son, was gone. I relayed the news calmly and my dad asked me to repeat what I had said and confirm by gone I meant gone gone and then he lost it on the phone and had his girlfriend drive him up from St. Augustine later that day because he was now in no state to drive. Unfortunately, my brother's passing occurred just 6 weeks after my wife and I brought our first child into the world which should have been a happier time. I would soon learn shortly after the day of shock how much and how easily I could cry my eyes out uncontrollably at hearing certain songs or having discussions about him and his life. I couldn't get past a couple of sentences without breaking down when relaying the news to friends and that same sequence happened with each friend I relayed the news to. It didn't get easier the 2nd or 3rd or 4th time etc. I remember going to my orthodontist appointment a few weeks after his passing. My brother also had an appointment scheduled at the same orthodontist set for a couple of weeks after mine. As I left my appointment, I relayed to the receptionist that my brother wouldn't be making his appointment and why and as the words left my mouth I abruptly rushed out of there to go bawl my eyes out in the car instead of in front of her. I'm generally the least outwardly emotional guy you'll run across, but losing someone close easily knocks down those protective walls.
A few days after burying my brother, I got a call from a friend the morning of the Metallica show at the Citrus Bowl in Orlando with an extra ticket asking if I wanted it. I asked him for a few minutes to consider the offer given my mental state at the time. The wife said to go, so I called him back and I went. It wound up being a great [BLEEP] show! I'd never seen Metallica before, but grew up getting into metal at a young age because of them. Had my brother still been alive, we'd have been trying to find a 3rd ticket because he would have been there too. If there's an afterlife, he was definitely there with me regardless. I remember tearing up a few times during the show with this thought in my mind. Very cathartic experience that particular show was for me.
Also, I lost my best friend suddenly at age 7. I remember my mom waking me one evening to tell me the news and I distinctly remember that cry, long ago as it was. It was like the universe had ripped a part of my soul from me, though I probably couldn't have put it into those words at that age. Same exact feeling with my brother.
[BLEEP] me, I'm tearing up just typing all this out.
Sorry to hear all that. I am the oldest of three boys. Just had a few drinks this past Saturday night with them over at Miller's Ale House. Couldn't imagine a world without them and I hope they both outlive me so I don't have to suffer the pain of burying one of them or both of them first.
I hear you on the crying as well. There's just different degrees and levels to it for everyone. My Mom recently thought she was diagnosed with Colon Cancer just two weeks ago. Thankfully everything came back in a positive way and it was caught early enough for her to clean her diet up.
But, man, it was rough hearing her cry like that. She hadn't cried like that since her Dad died. It just sticks with you. Metallica is awesome as well. Seen them twice. First time was probably around 2017 as well. We were in Orlando Florida at the World Camping Stadium. It was hotter than 40 hells but we enjoyed it.
Got introduced to Volbeat that day before AX7 came on after them as openers. Good stuff.
Yeah that was the same show I was at shortly after my brother died. Great show, indeed. And very cathartic for me as I said. My brother and I went to many shows together over the years.
