I agree, beauty contest are horrible for all but the winner.

 

You really don't see the similarities? I get the whole structure of sports, and the positive reinforcement (I'm not blind), but you can't build someone up without tearing someone else down. There is always a reaction to every action. So some Mommy's want there child to get a participation trophy ... so what? ... How does that ruin the "Working Hard" motto? ... Well, your reaction to the action of giving a participation trophy is exactly what it is. A one sided view ... otherwise there would be no problem for giving participation trophies. They don't change anything.

 

Or do they? The resentment for them says they do.

 

I disagree, the child that loses, or doesn't get the trophy, or whatever accolade we're talking about isn't being torn down, he/she is being taught an important lesson, a lesson that for some kids this is one of the very few opportunities they have a chance to learn.

 

Look my son for example is probably one of the slowest kids on our team, he's by no means an MVP or star player and he knows it. About mid season he came to me and said "Dad I want to quit I don't like this anymore" I asked him why, and told him if he had a good reason I'd let him quit. He told me he didn't like it because the other kids where faster and stronger then him. I told him "Son I don't care if you lose every game, I don't care if you're the worse player in the history of football, I don't care if EVERY play you get knocked down, so long as you get back up and try you're hardest the next play. I'll never be mad because you failed or did bad, I'll always be proud so long as you got up and give it your everything". 

 

At the end of the season they'll all probably get participation trophies, that's fine it doesn't bother me that bad, but I get what some are trying to say. Teaching these kids how to lose and persevere is equally apart of teaching them how to feel good about their accomplishments.

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I agree, beauty contest are horrible for all but the winner.

 

You really don't see the similarities? I get the whole structure of sports, and the positive reinforcement (I'm not blind), but you can't build someone up without tearing someone else down. There is always a reaction to every action. So some Mommy's want there child to get a participation trophy ... so what? ... How does that ruin the "Working Hard" motto? ... Well, your reaction to the action of giving a participation trophy is exactly what it is. A one sided view ... otherwise there would be no problem for giving participation trophies. They don't change anything.

 

Or do they? The resentment for them says they do.

You can build people up, kids too, without tearing someone else down. Praise in public, punish in private.

 

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TravC59, aka JacksJags. @TravC59 on Twitter
;
; "This is really good, you want a bite, Honey?"

 

 

Look my son for example is probably one of the slowest kids on our team, he's by no means an MVP or star player and he knows it.

Knock off the old block huh? :teehee:

---

TravC59, aka JacksJags. @TravC59 on Twitter
;
; "This is really good, you want a bite, Honey?"

 I told him "Son I don't care if you lose every game, I don't care if you're the worse player in the history of football, I don't care if EVERY play you get knocked down, so long as you get back up and try you're hardest the next play. I'll never be mad because you failed or did bad, I'll always be proud so long as you got up and give it your everything". 

 

This is no different than explaining to your Daughter she is beatiful after she doesn't win the contest. Your son is blessed to have a good parent.

 

Kids know who lost, and they are affected by losing. I know we as parents try to tell them that they shouldn't feel that way ... But people feel how they feel, especially kids.

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This is no different than explaining to your Daughter she is beatiful after she doesn't win the contest. Your son is blessed to have a good parent.

 

Kids know who lost, and they are affected by losing. I know we as parents try to tell them that they shouldn't feel that way ... But people feel how they feel, especially kids.

That is so true. Even in the leagues where the "scores aren't kept", every team knows. At soccer, after every goal, kids know. They shout it out to each other. Parents on the side keep score as well. Kids want to know the score. Kids want to win and compete with and for their team.

---

TravC59, aka JacksJags. @TravC59 on Twitter
;
; "This is really good, you want a bite, Honey?"

It's the value and meaning that is lost. It's not necessarily the trophy itself, it's what goes into it to earn something. If everyone gets the same thing, that meaning is lost. Teachable moments, or lessons are lessened, some diminished when we treat everyone as equals.

 

What if we gave all A's to the boys and girls who showed up to school. A's to the kids who barely have to open a book, who are naturally gifted with the skills to be successful and not even having to study. A's to everyone who did all the work possible, came in after school for extra help, worked hard to get what they do. A's to the kid who comes in and generally struggles to get average level work but works their tails off, we can call it an Atta Boy or Girl A. A's for the kids who are extremely smart but don't apply themselves, just lazy, they don't want to do anything. A's for the kid who just shows up, then wants to drool on his desk all day because he stayed up to late playing video games. Let's pat them all on the back and tell them they are good kids, they are going to be successful just because you showed up. Everyone deserves this A because you're all special and work hard.

 

Little extreme wouldn't you think?

 

Some people are more gifted than others, and some people outwork even the most gifted ones (Peyton Manningish). Teaching hard work is important, and as an educator you know which student is working hard, and which ones are gifted, and which ones have neither.

 

Positive reinforcement (I am going to have to finish this post later, too busy at the moment doing hard work)

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Knock off the old block huh? :teehee:

 

:woot: No denying I'm not a natural athlete, we Clarkes are of the working class

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 Or do they? The resentment for them says they do.

Kinda like the resentment that's being shown to those that don't like the trophies?

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What in the Wide Wide World of Sports is agoin' on here???

...

 

Mind if I start spoiling my grandkids?

 

Nope. Mind if I start making some?

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I'm trying to make myself more informed and less opinionated.

Stop saying whatever stupid thing you're talking about and pay attention to all the interesting things I have to say!

No doubt it will be. I think we are going to go to NC this year to see the Polar Express, and hopefully snow.

I think this the stance you are taking is funny considering you received trophys for participation while you grew up.

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It's the value and meaning that is lost. It's not necessarily the trophy itself, it's what goes into it to earn something. If everyone gets the same thing, that meaning is lost. Teachable moments, or lessons are lessened, some diminished when we treat everyone as equals.

 

What if we gave all A's to the boys and girls who showed up to school. A's to the kids who barely have to open a book, who are naturally gifted with the skills to be successful and not even having to study. A's to everyone who did all the work possible, came in after school for extra help, worked hard to get what they do. A's to the kid who comes in and generally struggles to get average level work but works their tails off, we can call it an Atta Boy or Girl A. A's for the kids who are extremely smart but don't apply themselves, just lazy, they don't want to do anything. A's for the kid who just shows up, then wants to drool on his desk all day because he stayed up to late playing video games. Let's pat them all on the back and tell them they are good kids, they are going to be successful just because you showed up. Everyone deserves this A because you're all special and work hard.

 

Even kids being 5-10 doesnt make them stupid.  They know who the best athletes are, who worked the hardest, who they would rely on.  A trophy at the end of the year isnt going to change that.

 

As usual, you are being a little bit over the top about things.

---

I think this the stance you are taking is funny considering you received trophys for participation while you grew up.

So that means that is what I should support?

 

Not to mention most did not, some did, yes.

---

TravC59, aka JacksJags. @TravC59 on Twitter
;
; "This is really good, you want a bite, Honey?"

Even kids being 5-10 doesnt make them stupid.  They know who the best athletes are, who worked the hardest, who they would rely on.  A trophy at the end of the year isnt going to change that.

 

As usual, you are being a little bit over the top about things.

Says you.

 

I never implied age makes anyone stupid. How do people make up their own things?

---

TravC59, aka JacksJags. @TravC59 on Twitter
;
; "This is really good, you want a bite, Honey?"

So that means that is what I should support?

 

Not to mention most did not, some did, yes.

 

Did getting those participation awards affect you when you grew up?

 

In the end you are either going to do well in life or your not. Those lazy kids who think getting a participation award means they are doing well in life are going to realize soon enough thats not what happens in the real world. 

 

They are freaking kids. You guys need to lighten up.

---

Nope. Mind if I start making some?

I wish you would.  I'm not gonna be alive forever....

---

I coached baseball for several years, and settled into coaching the kids in the junior/seniour divisions that were preparing to enter high school.  I did this for almost 10 years before my schedule pulled me away from coaching. 

 

A few years ago, my brother suckered me into coaching my nephews little league team because they were short on coaches.  These were 8-10 year olds, and it was more or less an instructional league using pitching machines.  Because I was the new coach, I basically wound up with the cast-offs.  A lot of kids who had never played before.  It was as close to the Bad News Bears as I've ever seen, minus the cooler full of beer. 

 

When I coached previously, you could make the kids run laps, and do other things to wake them up and to participate, and it was usually an effective tool.  When I came back, the league had changed so dramatically that no coaching tactics I'd used with a good deal of success previously were permitted.  Parents would coach from the bleachers, and when you asked them to stop, they'd just ignore the request and continue doing what they were doing.  When I asked them why they didn't just come out on the field and coach the team, they'd share select expletives and walk away. 

 

This team was really, really bad.  Most of the kids had no interest in being there, and those who did weren't very talented, but at least they were eager to learn.  Still, this was a team that would basically be the little league equivalent to the 2013 Jaguars.

 

It was league policy to give out game balls after each game.  One morning we had the early game at a neighboring ballpark.  The kids were half asleep, and the score was 20 something to nothing in two innings.  The other team just kept running the score up until we got to the point where the umpire called the game.  There was nobody that did anything remarkable, so I decided not to give out a game ball.  I explained to the kids who were still awake why nobody was getting one, and started packing up the gear.

 

A mother of one of the kids on my team came up and started shouting at me for not giving out a game ball.  I asked her what she saw on the field that would warrant one, and she said "Nothing, but you're still supposed to give out game balls.  It's not fair to the kids!"

 

I just shook my head and told her she needed to think about what she'd just said.  She did, and subsequently went to the president of the association and filed a complaint.  He was one of those slide pant wearing coaches who fancied himself to be some potential major league manager.  He called me up to the field and sat me down and started to explain to me why it was bad for the kids psyche to deviate from the league rules.  These kids look forward to getting a game ball, and we shouldn't disappoint them. 

 

It was at this point I realized that if we continued down this path of rewarding kids for nothing, it would eventually create problems when they became adults. 

 

I still have kids from my earlier coaching experience who keep in touch with me, including at least one who posts here periodically. These guys are all closing in on 30 years old now, and starting families of their own.  One of these kids in particular was a guy who was doing poorly in school, and his parents forced him to come to play baseball just to get him out of the house.  It took a lot of tough love to crack that kid, but I finally got him to quit resisting and to start participating.  Over the next few years he really got involved in baseball, and while he wasn't talented enough to play at the HS level, he developed such a passion for the game that he started to coach, and eventually became an umpire for the city (still does it).  Every time I hear from him to this day, it starts with "Hey coach!" and usually ends up with him thanking me for continuing to work with him despite the attitude.  His parents thanked me as well.  Not only did he spark an interest in baseball, but he also started to do better in school, and to behave better at home.  His dad still tells me if he'd known making the kid run laps would have broken the attitude, he would have done it sooner!  Today the "kid" is an engineer.

 

When I see all these associations who don't keep score because there are no winners or losers, or like our association, give out rewards even when it's not warranted, it makes me sick.  How can a kid find success if they don't ever learn what it means to fail?

 

Kudos to this bunch for bucking the trend by not giving out participation trophies.  Let the kids earn their rewards by actually earning them, and not simply because they show up and continue to breathe. 

---

Never argue with idiots. They drag you down to their level and beat you with experience.

Did getting those participation awards affect you when you grew up?

 

In the end you are either going to do well in life or your not. Those lazy kids who think getting a participation award means they are doing well in life are going to realize soon enough thats not what happens in the real world. 

 

They are freaking kids. You guys need to lighten up.

Yes, kids will either do well or not. Life lessons while growing up don't have any effect.

---

TravC59, aka JacksJags. @TravC59 on Twitter
;
; "This is really good, you want a bite, Honey?"

I coached baseball for several years, and settled into coaching the kids in the junior/seniour divisions that were preparing to enter high school.  I did this for almost 10 years before my schedule pulled me away from coaching. 

 

A few years ago, my brother suckered me into coaching my nephews little league team because they were short on coaches.  These were 8-10 year olds, and it was more or less an instructional league using pitching machines.  Because I was the new coach, I basically wound up with the cast-offs.  A lot of kids who had never played before.  It was as close to the Bad News Bears as I've ever seen, minus the cooler full of beer. 

 

When I coached previously, you could make the kids run laps, and do other things to wake them up and to participate, and it was usually an effective tool.  When I came back, the league had changed so dramatically that no coaching tactics I'd used with a good deal of success previously were permitted.  Parents would coach from the bleachers, and when you asked them to stop, they'd just ignore the request and continue doing what they were doing.  When I asked them why they didn't just come out on the field and coach the team, they'd share select expletives and walk away. 

 

This team was really, really bad.  Most of the kids had no interest in being there, and those who did weren't very talented, but at least they were eager to learn.  Still, this was a team that would basically be the little league equivalent to the 2013 Jaguars.

 

It was league policy to give out game balls after each game.  One morning we had the early game at a neighboring ballpark.  The kids were half asleep, and the score was 20 something to nothing in two innings.  The other team just kept running the score up until we got to the point where the umpire called the game.  There was nobody that did anything remarkable, so I decided not to give out a game ball.  I explained to the kids who were still awake why nobody was getting one, and started packing up the gear.

 

A mother of one of the kids on my team came up and started shouting at me for not giving out a game ball.  I asked her what she saw on the field that would warrant one, and she said "Nothing, but you're still supposed to give out game balls.  It's not fair to the kids!"

 

I just shook my head and told her she needed to think about what she'd just said.  She did, and subsequently went to the president of the association and filed a complaint.  He was one of those slide pant wearing coaches who fancied himself to be some potential major league manager.  He called me up to the field and sat me down and started to explain to me why it was bad for the kids psyche to deviate from the league rules.  These kids look forward to getting a game ball, and we shouldn't disappoint them. 

 

It was at this point I realized that if we continued down this path of rewarding kids for nothing, it would eventually create problems when they became adults. 

 

I still have kids from my earlier coaching experience who keep in touch with me, including at least one who posts here periodically. These guys are all closing in on 30 years old now, and starting families of their own.  One of these kids in particular was a guy who was doing poorly in school, and his parents forced him to come to play baseball just to get him out of the house.  It took a lot of tough love to crack that kid, but I finally got him to quit resisting and to start participating.  Over the next few years he really got involved in baseball, and while he wasn't talented enough to play at the HS level, he developed such a passion for the game that he started to coach, and eventually became an umpire for the city (still does it).  Every time I hear from him to this day, it starts with "Hey coach!" and usually ends up with him thanking me for continuing to work with him despite the attitude.  His parents thanked me as well.  Not only did he spark an interest in baseball, but he also started to do better in school, and to behave better at home.  His dad still tells me if he'd known making the kid run laps would have broken the attitude, he would have done it sooner!  Today the "kid" is an engineer.

 

When I see all these associations who don't keep score because there are no winners or losers, or like our association, give out rewards even when it's not warranted, it makes me sick.  How can a kid find success if they don't ever learn what it means to fail?

 

Kudos to this bunch for bucking the trend by not giving out participation trophies.  Let the kids earn their rewards by actually earning them, and not simply because they show up and continue to breathe. 

The underlined is why I coach. I get visitors back all the time, and it is great. I've dealt with kids like the one you explained, and it is a good feeling to see them make that turn.

 

Nice post FBT, thanks for sharing.

---

TravC59, aka JacksJags. @TravC59 on Twitter
;
; "This is really good, you want a bite, Honey?"

I still have the ribbon I won as a kid participating in a relay race. Sponsored by Oscar Mayer..


Everyone's a weiner..

---

I coached baseball for several years, and settled into coaching the kids in the junior/seniour divisions that were preparing to enter high school.  I did this for almost 10 years before my schedule pulled me away from coaching. 

 

A few years ago, my brother suckered me into coaching my nephews little league team because they were short on coaches.  These were 8-10 year olds, and it was more or less an instructional league using pitching machines.  Because I was the new coach, I basically wound up with the cast-offs.  A lot of kids who had never played before.  It was as close to the Bad News Bears as I've ever seen, minus the cooler full of beer. 

 

When I coached previously, you could make the kids run laps, and do other things to wake them up and to participate, and it was usually an effective tool.  When I came back, the league had changed so dramatically that no coaching tactics I'd used with a good deal of success previously were permitted.  Parents would coach from the bleachers, and when you asked them to stop, they'd just ignore the request and continue doing what they were doing.  When I asked them why they didn't just come out on the field and coach the team, they'd share select expletives and walk away. 

 

This team was really, really bad.  Most of the kids had no interest in being there, and those who did weren't very talented, but at least they were eager to learn.  Still, this was a team that would basically be the little league equivalent to the 2013 Jaguars.

 

It was league policy to give out game balls after each game.  One morning we had the early game at a neighboring ballpark.  The kids were half asleep, and the score was 20 something to nothing in two innings.  The other team just kept running the score up until we got to the point where the umpire called the game.  There was nobody that did anything remarkable, so I decided not to give out a game ball.  I explained to the kids who were still awake why nobody was getting one, and started packing up the gear.

 

A mother of one of the kids on my team came up and started shouting at me for not giving out a game ball.  I asked her what she saw on the field that would warrant one, and she said "Nothing, but you're still supposed to give out game balls.  It's not fair to the kids!"

 

I just shook my head and told her she needed to think about what she'd just said.  She did, and subsequently went to the president of the association and filed a complaint.  He was one of those slide pant wearing coaches who fancied himself to be some potential major league manager.  He called me up to the field and sat me down and started to explain to me why it was bad for the kids psyche to deviate from the league rules.  These kids look forward to getting a game ball, and we shouldn't disappoint them. 

 

It was at this point I realized that if we continued down this path of rewarding kids for nothing, it would eventually create problems when they became adults. 

 

I still have kids from my earlier coaching experience who keep in touch with me, including at least one who posts here periodically. These guys are all closing in on 30 years old now, and starting families of their own.  One of these kids in particular was a guy who was doing poorly in school, and his parents forced him to come to play baseball just to get him out of the house.  It took a lot of tough love to crack that kid, but I finally got him to quit resisting and to start participating.  Over the next few years he really got involved in baseball, and while he wasn't talented enough to play at the HS level, he developed such a passion for the game that he started to coach, and eventually became an umpire for the city (still does it).  Every time I hear from him to this day, it starts with "Hey coach!" and usually ends up with him thanking me for continuing to work with him despite the attitude.  His parents thanked me as well.  Not only did he spark an interest in baseball, but he also started to do better in school, and to behave better at home.  His dad still tells me if he'd known making the kid run laps would have broken the attitude, he would have done it sooner!  Today the "kid" is an engineer.

 

When I see all these associations who don't keep score because there are no winners or losers, or like our association, give out rewards even when it's not warranted, it makes me sick.  How can a kid find success if they don't ever learn what it means to fail?

 

Kudos to this bunch for bucking the trend by not giving out participation trophies.  Let the kids earn their rewards by actually earning them, and not simply because they show up and continue to breathe. 

 

Thank you for sharing FBT a great example of what youth sports are about.

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