I worked with a guy in the Navy who avoided punishment for being late because of his crazy but true story. He was sleeping with a married woman whose husband worked nights. The husband came home early one shift and ol' boy was still in the sack with his wife. He hid between the bed and the wall and laid there for a couple of hours until the wife could distract her husband long enough for him to make an exit. This made him late for work. After telling his chain of command why he was so late they let him go because 'No one could make up a story like that.'

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