Quote:The first part, I agree with.  But it's certainly not a symptom of single parent homes.


A lot of the parents my wife has had trouble contacting were still married.  While some of the single mother's she's tried to get a hold of were the ones most eager to work with her.  Of course that's not all of them.  There have been single parents who didn't get involved when she tried calling them.  Just as there were many married parents who were too busy with their jobs who didn't get involved.  Or who simply didn't care.


I don't think it has much to do with morals either.  It's our culture and how little we value intelligence and education.  People consider teachers 'overpaid babysitters'  (My wife wants to know who pays their babysitter less than $2.00/hour per kid).  Anytime teachers want a raise, they're vilified as trying to take more of the taxpayers money.  People say they just want 'accountability' which would mean 'higher pay and lower job security' in theory, but actually means lower pay and lower job security.  I know anytime the school board up here asks for more money, they never get what they need.   There'll always be cuts made.  On the other hand when the pentagon has no need for jets, they'll gladly spend billions on them.  (Source: Heritage foundation)


You don't know how many times my wife has been asked "Why does my kid need to learn this?"  As a teacher it's her least favorite question.  She's recently started by asking in return "Why don't they need to?"  (as politely as possible)


Parents are certainly part of the problem.  Of course some of the reforms are part of the problem too.  We don't get teachers input on the reforms.  Sometimes the unions fail them there.  (Though some unions have recently stood against Common Core, despite initially supporting it)  Take for example things like 'social promotion'.  Where they say it's worse to hold a child back than it is to send them on to the next grade without adequately knowing what they should.  They just send them on to the next grade so they won't feel ostracized.  (This makes teachers jobs much harder).  They don't so much think social promotion is good, as much as they think holding students back is bad.  Most teachers oppose social promotion, but of course no reason to listen to them.


You have two types of problem parents:


The Type that doesn't care.  Doesn't really matter if it's a single or double parent home.  It can be for a variety of reasons.  They don't have time to get involved because of their job.  Some just want to get their kids out of their house as fast as they possibly can.  Their eighteenth birthday comes, and their present is a one way ticket to whatever apartment they can afford.  They have no interest in their child's education.  They see parents as babysitters who take care of their kids for 180 days of the year.  I remember my wife telling me about a student who BEGGED her parents to let her stay at home while she finished high school.  She said it nearly broke her heart to see it.  


The type that thinks their child can do no wrong.  It used to be when a student was doing bad in school, the parents looked to their kids to see what they were doing wrong.  Now they look to the teacher instead.  To illustrate my point, here's a political cartoon:




The responsibility has shifted from kids to teachers.  Now some teachers aren't doing their jobs.  You'll find that in every profession.  They seem to be the only ones you ever hear about on the news, except for when there's a school shooting and you hear about how a teacher protected their students to the best of their ability.  (Much like with cops) You rarely hear about the good teachers in the news.  You only hear about the ones that slept with their students.  You don't hear about the ones that spend their own money on supplies, probably because the stories are extremely common.  They'd be reporting it every day.  Kids have a responsibility too.  As do parents to make sure that their kids are doing their work.  My parents made me do my homework.  It's certainly not something exclusive to two parent homes.  I have two friends who grew up with single mothers, and they both made their kids do their homework.  I remember my wife who had a student who's parents were divorced, and one of them was easy to work with while the other was difficult (The student had a lot of absences, but was otherwise a good student).  Some people wouldn't make good parents even if they had a partner.  


You also have parents who think they're right, and the teacher's wrong no matter what.   The ones who think their kids deserve A's for their work.  And a lot of time principal's will take the side of parents over their teachers when it goes that far (and sometimes it does go that far).  Of course it depends on the principal too.


Ultimately our culture has changed.  But I don't think it's the acceptance of single parent homes.  (Some of them aren't even single parents by choice) or anything like that.  It's the devaluing of education by so many parents.  And even some kids.  I mean being top of the class tends to get you picked on in school.  it's something that should be revered.  


Just look at higher education.


You can throw a basketball through a hoop?  We'll pay for your education!  Full ride.  (At least as long as you can still play, and you'll have to take some junk courses so we don't have to actually educate you.  But if you can throw a basketball through a hoop?  You'll make us a lot of money!  Err... I mean, we'll make you a lot of money.  Yeah.  That's what I meant."


You're really smart?  Well, you might qualify for some assistance.  Take out some loans, and then pay our high tuition rates.  Too bad you can't use a real skill like basketball.  


I'm not saying that it's bad that basketball players get scholarships (or football players, or the such).  It's perfectly fine.  But we should be valuing just as much the ones who are smart.  And those basketball players should be getting real educations, not taking junk courses or having someone else do their work for them. 

 

I understand and respect your passion on this issue.  You do bring up some fine points, but some I must disagree with.

 

First, most single parent homes are not involved as much in their children's education/lives.  There is the exception on occasion, and I commend them.

 

I do agree and believe that a lot of two parent homes have "parents" that for whatever reason are not involved in their children's education/lives.  I would bet that the number is probably significantly lower than that of single parent homes, though I have no data to back up that theory.

 

I do believe that it is all about morals.  The majority of single parent homes (though not all) are the product of a promiscuous lifestyle.  I would also bet that many children that come from a two parent household where the parents don't get involved in their education are also never exposed to religion or any form of discipline that promotes responsibility.  Don't get me wrong, I'm not saying that people should be religious or should belong to a certain religion, but the teachings from these institutions tends to be positive.

 

I'm also willing to bet that more children are born due to "mistakes" rather than being planned.

 

When it comes to teachers, I think that there are two types.  The first, and in my mind probably the majority, really care about what they do.  They are hard working and yes, I would say under paid for what they do.  The other type is a typical liberal that thinks that they are owed something.  Rather than educate students they "indoctrinate" or "teach" them about liberal principles.  History is distorted, and real civics is pretty much ignored.  I see the latter example more and more every day with some of the news and blog stories that come out.  To deny that it exists is wrong.  Again, I'm not saying that it's all teachers and all schools, but it does exist.

 

I do agree with you about devaluing education by some.  There is a reason why back in our history it was forbidden to teach slaves how to read.  Knowledge is power.  However, by the same token gaining knowledge should lead to something.  What use is a college educated student with a degree in Liberal Arts for example?

 

The bottom line is, it points back to homes, families and tradition.

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