I’m no singer/songwriter but, I think some good opportunities were omitted


Gas booty, fart booty
Wind booty, air biscuit booty
Flatulence booty, bottom burp booty
Toot booty, vapor booty
Trumpet booty, hump it booty

Tutti fruity booty, open booty
Gaping booty, used booty
AIDS booty, Monkey pox booty

Dude.. That's a bad [BLEEP] remix!! We need more!!

MORE BOOOOOOOTY!!!

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Ummm..

Butt junkie, butt funky
Butt monkey, butt honey
Butt sugar, butt booger
Butt down, butt brown

???   Yeah… I just mow lawns for a living, man.

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I think my wife is ready to kill me..

I downloaded the booty song and made it my ringtone

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I think my wife is ready to kill me..

I downloaded the booty song and made it my ringtone

Butt Munch, butt punch
But sponge, butt plunge
Butt crime, ‘bout time
Butt thriller, butt killer

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I'm getting all sorts of junk emails, supposedly from Home Depot, Ace Hardware, Lowes, etc etc etc.  They all claim I have won some little power tool, and I just have to respond to claim it.  But the funny thing is, they all misspell the same word: congratulations.  They all spell it "congratualtions."  These are just from today:

From Ace Hardware: 
"Congratualtions! You have been chosen to receive a brand new Weber Spirit II E-310! To claim, simply take this short survey about your experience with us."

From Lowes:
"Dear Lowes shopper- Congratualtions! You have been chosen to receive a brand new Makita Power Drill Set! To claim, simply take this short survey about your experience with us."

From T-Mobile:
"Congratualtions! Please tell us about your T-Mobile experiences and as a thank you, you can select from several exclusive offer rewards!"

They all land in my junk email folder, so it's no big deal, but it's kind of funny.  This has been going on for weeks and they still send them out that way.  Congratualtions!

It comes from the same generation that decided to make mid-word 'T's silent, for whatever reason (think Titans, without the 2nd T). Personally, I think this is a by-product of the hip hop culture, or maybe I'm just being too Euro 'white'. I dunno. Now get off my lawn, you whippersnappers!

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"Remember Red, Hope is a good thing. Maybe the best of things. And no good thing ever dies."  - Andy Dufresne, The Shawshank Redemption

I just had to post something to get that depressing Olivia Newton-John headline off the front page.

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I'm sweating in places that are unnatural. So sick of the highs in the upper 90s with a heat index of satan's sauna.

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I'm sweating in places that are unnatural. So sick of the highs in the upper 90s with a heat index of satan's sauna.

You leave my ex-wife and her sauna alone!!

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I'm sweating in places that are unnatural. So sick of the highs in the upper 90s with a heat index of satan's sauna.

You leave my ex-wife and her sauna alone!!

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Anne Heche has died. It's damn lucky she didn't take others with her.

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Welp..... Just renewed my NFL Sunday Ticket subscription.... Hopefully the Jags will do a lot better this season under a new head coach

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You know trouble is right around the corner when your best friend tells you to hold his beer!!

Get to do one of my all time favorite tasks today, cleaning out the gutters.

Ugh.

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Get to do one of my all time favorite tasks today, cleaning out the gutters.

Ugh.

That's why I live in an apartment...... No Gutters to clean......... That, and I'm disabled so I wouldn't be able to do any chores anywat..... I'd need to hire someone to do all my outside work. Bad enough, I need to use a cleaning servive to clean my apartment since I'm unable to......

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You know trouble is right around the corner when your best friend tells you to hold his beer!!

I’ll be bock…

https://youtube.com/shorts/CEloGdMOiIQ?feature=share

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I’ll be bock…

https://youtube.com/shorts/CEloGdMOiIQ?feature=share

That is AWESOME!   Clumsy little feller, but cool as hell.  I was thoroughly impressed at the same time I was laughing my [BLEEP] off.  If I ever get chased by a robot, I’ll just roll a barrel at him and run like hell!

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I’ll be bock…

https://youtube.com/shorts/CEloGdMOiIQ?feature=share

That's pretty bad [BLEEP]..  All cool and all until that thing goes all Robocop Scene 27 on ya lolol

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I’m not sure spinning the thing around while it has a loaded firearm is a great idea.

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I’m not sure spinning the thing around while it has a loaded firearm is a great idea.

It's in the name of SCIENCE dude!!





Won't catch me 'round that junk though lolol

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I’m not sure spinning the thing around while it has a loaded firearm is a great idea.

It's in the name of SCIENCE dude!!





Won't catch me 'round that junk though lolol

This video explains why it’s not cool to bully people.  They had it coming.  Pushing him, hitting him with a hockey stick, balls to the face???   What did they expect?  Dude is gonna break and [BLEEP] up yo [BLEEP] up.

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I’m on the robots side for his actions. I wouldn’t play trivial pursuit with it just yet

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It's about time. We had a cold front come in and the temp is 82° with 30% humidity and the dew point is 49°. We've been at upper 90s with humidity in the 80% range and the dew point at mid-70s making temps uncomfortable.

It actually feels awesome outside. Finally!

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