Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

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80% of what I talk about is nonesense.. the other 25% is made up statistics...


 

Why do kamikaze pilots wear helmets?

Same reason they swab the spot down with alcohol for a lethal injection.

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What in the Wide Wide World of Sports is agoin' on here???

Why do you turn down the radio in the car when you're looking for an address?

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Why do you turn down the radio in the car when you're looking for an address?

So I can hear my own voice when I talk to myself; “122, 124, 128, 128?? Where the hell is 126?? What the...”

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Shouldn’t apartments be called togetherments?

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Do bill collectors really think people will pick up the phone if they call every hour?

Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk

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"What do I know of cultured ways, the gilt, the craft and the lie? I, who was born in a naked land and bred in the open sky. The subtle tongue, the sophist guile, they fail when the broadswords sing; Rush in and die, dogs - I was a man before I was a king."

Do bill collectors really think people will pick up the phone if they call every hour?

Sent from my SM-G960U using Tapatalk

I use a robo-caller, so you're lucky it's just once an hour.

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“An empty vessel makes the loudest sound, so they that have the least wit are the greatest babblers.”. - Plato

Why do people cover their sneezes while outside?

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Why do people cover their sneezes while outside?

Because flying snot sucks, no matter where it happens.

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What in the Wide Wide World of Sports is agoin' on here???

Why do people cover their sneezes while outside?

Because flying snot sucks, no matter where it happens.

Unless you're doing the nose cannon.

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Why do people cover their sneezes while outside?

Out of habit.  At least that’s why I do it.  I’d be wary of the guy that doesn’t cover his sneeze outside.

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Although that does bring up another question. Say, your in a public restroom using a urinal that has the auto flush and it’s one of those restrooms you walk through the corridor and double back. So the is no door. Do you wash your hands? I do, but often think to myself that my junk is cleaner than anything else I’d touch in that bathroom.

Taking this further, do you wash or cleanse leather belts? You know after wiping you’re not waddling over to wash your hands before pulling up the britches and fastening the belt. Belts must look nasty under a black light.

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Why would you want to discharge that nastiness on your own arm or hand when it's not necessary? When outside, I spray with gusto. Even while driving I'll let 'er rip out the window. Like peeing outdoors, it's liberating.

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Although that does bring up another question.   Say, your in a public restroom using a urinal that has the auto flush and it’s one of those restrooms you walk through the corridor and double back.  So the is no door.  Do you wash your hands?   I do, but often think to myself that my junk is cleaner than anything else I’d touch in that bathroom.  

Taking this further, do you wash or cleanse leather belts?  You know after wiping you’re not waddling over to wash your hands before pulling up the britches and fastening the belt.  Belts must look nasty under a black light.

I wash my hands every time I use a public restroom. The way I look at it, never pass up an opportunity to wash your mitts. 

Yeah, the belt... 

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Why would you want to discharge that nastiness on your own arm or hand when it's not necessary? When outside, I spray with gusto. Even while driving I'll let 'er rip out the window. Like peeing outdoors, it's liberating.

You said discharge.  Hehe.  Can’t argue the peeing outside thing, it is nice.  I’ll tell you what, next time I have an urge to sneeze while outside I’ll give it a shot.  I’ll measure the level of liberation, and report back my findings.

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Why would you want to discharge that nastiness on your own arm or hand when it's not necessary? When outside, I spray with gusto. Even while driving I'll let 'er rip out the window. Like peeing outdoors, it's liberating.

Can’t argue the peeing outside thing, it is nice.  I’ll tell you what, next time I have an urge to sneeze while outside I’ll give it a shot.  

Exercise caution when combining the two.  The sudden muscle movement associated with a sneeze can significantly alter trajectory.

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When you get into the endzone, act like you've been there before.

Can’t argue the peeing outside thing, it is nice.  I’ll tell you what, next time I have an urge to sneeze while outside I’ll give it a shot.  

Exercise caution when combining the two.  The sudden muscle movement associated with a sneeze can significantly alter trajectory.

Good  point.  I think it’s also noteworthy to remember (if you are an arm sneeze coverer) if you combine the two, to not use the arm attached to the hand that’s holding your penis.  That could potentially leave you with a wet shoulder or worse.

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Why do people cover their sneezes while outside?

I refer to it as cognitive efficiency - remember as little as needed. If you cover all the time, you don't need to process the question "Am I inside, or outside?" before the sneeze comes.

It's also why I suck at history - if it's in a book somewhere, I don't need to memorize it.  I just need to know how and where to find the info.

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Although that does bring up another question.   Say, your in a public restroom using a urinal that has the auto flush and it’s one of those restrooms you walk through the corridor and double back.  So the is no door.  Do you wash your hands?   I do, but often think to myself that my junk is cleaner than anything else I’d touch in that bathroom.  

Taking this further, do you wash or cleanse leather belts?  You know after wiping you’re not waddling over to wash your hands before pulling up the britches and fastening the belt.  Belts must look nasty under a black light.

given what they are normally seeking when examining with black light, I question what you are doing in the public restroom.

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Why do people cover their sneezes while outside?

I refer to it as cognitive efficiency - remember as little as needed. If you cover all the time, you don't need to process the question "Am I inside, or outside?" before the sneeze comes.

It's also why I suck at history - if it's in a book somewhere, I don't need to memorize it.  I just need to know how and where to find the info.

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Although that does bring up another question.   Say, your in a public restroom using a urinal that has the auto flush and it’s one of those restrooms you walk through the corridor and double back.  So the is no door.  Do you wash your hands?   I do, but often think to myself that my junk is cleaner than anything else I’d touch in that bathroom.  

Taking this further, do you wash or cleanse leather belts?  You know after wiping you’re not waddling over to wash your hands before pulling up the britches and fastening the belt.  Belts must look nasty under a black light.

given what they are normally seeking when examining with black light, I question what you are doing in the public restroom.

Through several decades of relentless Zen-like training, I’ve conditioned my brain to immediately discern whether I’m outside or inside. So quickly, in fact, that I have completely eliminated the need to initially question my whereabouts. Grasshoppa has come far.

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(sigh) Oh, for God’s sake!

Just making sure no one goes there! I’ve got to earn my paycheck on here by doing occasional moding!

I thought that said modeling. I was about to reach for my checkbook.

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I refer to it as cognitive efficiency - remember as little as needed. If you cover all the time, you don't need to process the question "Am I inside, or outside?" before the sneeze comes.

It's also why I suck at history - if it's in a book somewhere, I don't need to memorize it.  I just need to know how and where to find the info.

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given what they are normally seeking when examining with black light, I question what you are doing in the public restroom.

Through several decades of relentless Zen-like training, I’ve conditioned my brain to immediately discern whether I’m outside or inside. So quickly, in fact, that I have completely eliminated the need to initially question my whereabouts. Grasshoppa has come far.

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Just making sure no one goes there! I’ve got to earn my paycheck on here by doing occasional moding!

I thought that said modeling. I was about to reach for my checkbook.

You don't write checks for that service, it's a cash only business.

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“An empty vessel makes the loudest sound, so they that have the least wit are the greatest babblers.”. - Plato

Through several decades of relentless Zen-like training, I’ve conditioned my brain to immediately discern whether I’m outside or inside. So quickly, in fact, that I have completely eliminated the need to initially question my whereabouts. Grasshoppa has come far.

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I thought that said modeling. I was about to reach for my checkbook.

You don't write checks for that service, it's a cash only business.

Technically, that's not modeling you're talking about.

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If something can corrupt you, you're corrupted already.
- Bob Marley