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Tmd much easier said than done. When you invest half your life with her. These things are hard

http://youtu.be/9dZW1C3neao

 

 

 

Oran Juice Jones tells it like it is at 2:22 onward. 

Yea if you are the raging type. I don't know if you've been in my situation but there are 2 halves, what you see in the video above, and then the part that still loves her. 

 

 

Either way, one or the other will happen. 

Quote:Tmd much easier said than done. When you invest half your life with her. These things are hard

 

Hey man, I've been there. It sucks. 

 

 

Its your life you gotta handle it the best way you see fit, but I know I wouldn't put up with that crap for a second. I find out a woman cheats on me, I'm gone. Have a nice life! Sayanara, muchacha!!! I've always been faithful to the woman I was with in relationships and I expect the same. No one says its "easy" to do so, but it can be done if its important to you. Obviously it isn't important enough to her. So, I'd say fine, see ya. You deserve a woman that will be. Yeah, I know in todays world its practically impossible,.... but I still am optimistic a few are still out there that can remain committed to a monogamous relationship. Or maybe I should substitute "optimistic" with "naive". 

We'll see how it plays out my friend. Right now I'm am devoid of all emotion, a half a liter of ketel one vodka will do that to a person. Funny thing is I gotta get up in 3 hours to get some errands done to prep for my son's b-day before I go to work. but you know what bro? i am gonna handle of business like a boss. 

Quote:We'll see how it plays out my friend. Right now I'm am devoid of all emotion, a half a liter of ketel one vodka will do that to a person. Funny thing is I gotta get up in 3 hours to get some errands done to prep for my son's b-day before I go to work. but you know what bro? i am gonna handle of business like a boss. 

 

Best of luck, bro. Stay strong!

If she's 50/50 you've done all you can man, who knows what happens down the road but for now you gotta focus on you and the kid

Telling where her mind is she would do all this the week of her sons bday

I got to say it is a little strange that she meets a person once and then says we had a connection and pursues it. Where does that ever end then? Anytime she feels a connection with someone she can just pursue it without any regard to you or your/her son? That seems extremely selfish. Besides the fact that she doesn't seem to show any remorse and obviously thinks it is okay and is going to continue pursuing this girl. Good luck, but I'm with TMD on this. It would be different if she did this, was sorry, made a mistake, etc... but that does not seem to be what is happening. And I do understand since I have been with my wife since I was 15.

A lot to digest here but let's keep it simple. She's broken your trust and that's impossible to get back. She clearly doesn't value your feelings. I would move on in a heartbeat. There are honest, caring women out there and the longer you stay with this one, the longer you delay being truly happy with one of the good ones.


My second marriage is the best thing that's ever happened to me. My wife & I have been married for seven years now and it's leaps and bounds better than my first marriage.

Sorry BigJag. Truly bad news. I would only give you two bits of advice: stay off the sauce and don't lose sight of your real priorities (healing and happiness of your son and yourself).

Quote:I got to say it is a little strange that she meets a person once and then says we had a connection and pursues it. Where does that ever end then? Anytime she feels a connection with someone she can just pursue it without any regard to you or your/her son? That seems extremely selfish. Besides the fact that she doesn't seem to show any remorse and obviously thinks it is okay and is going to continue pursuing this girl. Good luck, but I'm with TMD on this. It would be different if she did this, was sorry, made a mistake, etc... but that does not seem to be what is happening. And I do understand since I have been with my wife since I was 15.

I am with you. It is either taking what she said as the truth, or the relationship started much, much further back and they kept it well hidden.

Quote:We'll see how it plays out my friend. Right now I'm am devoid of all emotion, a half a liter of ketel one vodka will do that to a person. Funny thing is I gotta get up in 3 hours to get some errands done to prep for my son's b-day before I go to work. but you know what bro? i am gonna handle of business like a boss. 

 

Has your wife ever had a relationship with a woman before?  It seems rather quick that you went from a seemingly happy marriage to her cheating...with a woman.

Quote:Sorry BigJag. Truly bad news. I would only give you two bits of advice: stay off the sauce and don't lose sight of your real priorities (healing and happiness of your son and yourself).

This ^^

 

Someone has to have a clear head to deal with the responsibilities of being the adult.  It sounds like she's been looking for something for a while if she could make a connection that quickly, tossing aside any concern about the ramifications. 

 

If she's on the fence about what she should do after coming clean, it's clear the newness of the relationship she's developed with this other woman is intriguing enough for her to pursue regardless of what it may cost her.  I understand your position that you've invested half your life in this relationship, but so has she, and she's pretty much tossed it aside at the first opportunity.  You need to protect yourself and your son. Find a decent lawyer, and prepare for the worst.  She'll discover soon enough that this romantic interlude is just that, and then real life will kick her in the head. 

 

If it was this easy for her to stray this time, it will happen again.  It doesn't matter what she says. 

Quote:I got to say it is a little strange that she meets a person once and then says we had a connection and pursues it. Where does that ever end then? Anytime she feels a connection with someone she can just pursue it without any regard to you or your/her son? That seems extremely selfish. Besides the fact that she doesn't seem to show any remorse and obviously thinks it is okay and is going to continue pursuing this girl. Good luck, but I'm with TMD on this. It would be different if she did this, was sorry, made a mistake, etc... but that does not seem to be what is happening. And I do understand since I have been with my wife since I was 15.

I thought the same thing... very selfish. She obviously doesn't care to keep the marriage together. And they have a kid. Ridiculous.


Bigjag57, time to move on. She ripped your heart out and showed no regret. That is pretty cold. She probably blames you for her not being satisfied. I don't know how you can fight for her when she doesn't even care about what this does to your family.


One thing is certain... I would never be 50/50 on some random chick and what's best for my kids. That idea is foreign to me and I will never understand it. This wanting to be independent and live without responsibility is so overrated. I'm sure she will realize that eventually, but for now she has made her choice. If you are 50/50 on marriage, you are really 0/100.

Uggh...

So up already. Hung over but right now all is left is her to decide. What's funny is her childhood friend recently got beat within an inch of her life by her boyfriend and went right back to the dude when she got out of hospital. But it is what it is.

Quote:So up already. Hung over but right now all is left is her to decide. What's funny is her childhood friend recently got beat within an inch of her life by her boyfriend and went right back to the dude when she got out of hospital. But it is what it is.

It seems like she's already made her decision. Do you really want to be with someone that doesn't think they want to be with you and can fall into something so fast with someone else? Say she gets scared about going it alone and decides to stay with you...until the next time she's bored comes around and she's out looking for something exciting again.


The woman is not happy...she's not suddenly going to become happy. Even if she picks you, she might be able to fake it for a while...but she'll still be unhappy and this is all going to happen again.

Im going to be real safe with this and just give my 2 cents.

 

Is your self esteem really that low to where you will let her call the shots in terms of ending the relationship. If you are not comfortable with where the relationship is heading, file the divorce paperwork, take full custody of the child, and start the child support process. 

 

if you are looking for breakup sex just to have one last good moment before both of you all walk out of each other's life, you will never move on. 

 

This is the moment where you leave feelings out of this. Business/Manhood and focus comes into play. Remember both of you are in this for the better of your child, and want little disruption in his/her life as possible.

 

I dont know if you are or not spiritual, but if you are confused about which direction to go, dont be afraid to seek guidance and or counseling. Dont use alcohol or drugs as an outlet because that will effect your relationship with your child.

 

Good luck.

Quote:Wow,....the outcome is sort of what I expected, but figured it would be with a male not a female....but nowadays, you not only have to worry about them cheating with other guys but now also women...smh....






I wouldn't fight to keep her. (easy for me to say, I know,) but I wouldn't put up with that crap. Cheating is cheating. I'm not some sucker that lets them off the hook by saying its not cheating if its with another female. Its another loophole that they created (or tried to).


I'd get yourself a good lawyer, cancel any joint credit cards, make sure she can't suck any more money from you and take your child and get the hell away from her as fast as you can.


SHe's the one choosing this. Well, then she lies in the bed she made.

Quote:Oran Juice Jones tells it like it is at 2:22 onward.

TMD I think this may have been your best post ever. What do you know about "The Juice"?!


BigJag, I think you have to move on. She obviously doesn't want to make it work and you deserve to be with someone who wants to be with you. Hit her were it hurts (the purse), hire a good lawyer and don't look back. If she's willing to walk away from it all for some "fling" then she didn't really want to be there from the start.